Fun with English

[lordshipmayhem]

1) We are in a restaurant.
Donna, to Gabe, as he raises his shirt to his face thus exposing his belly: "Are you trying to flash the restaurant?"
Gabe, matter-of-factly: "Yep." ^_^
Well, at least he's honest.

2) From an online fic, whose author for obvious reasons (to wit, that Ginny will hunt the author down and do not-nice things the them) shall remain anonymous:
"they new how to through a party." - with which, anonymous fic author owes me one new keyboard. Or is that "knew" keyboard?
"we where at war and me being week could only watch" - and I bet he could only watch for seven days...
" I manned buckets of water ready for any fir in the castle" - how nice, he waters the plants...
"The room was used primarily for sorting out arguments of the villagers but trials where also held hear for murder, stealing and other acts of the Lords lay being broken." Can the English language sue the author for assault and battery?
"you flee of a dog" - Does your dog have flees? Try Flee Powder on them!!
" Queen struggled and put up an admiral fight" - her Navy, unfortunately, did not put up an admiral fight...

Comments

[strayfish.livejournal.com]

And you continued reading it why? That would drive me insane. Though it amuses me that the words are all used in ways that a spellchecker couldn't catch. ^_^;

[lordshipmayhem.livejournal.com]

I continued reading it because I was having far too much fun with the story. It was so unintentionally funny.

ANd yes, it was a howl that all the words would pass a spellchecker's hawklike gaze.

[bunnyhero.livejournal.com]

damn, those are painful! XD

[lordshipmayhem.livejournal.com]

Painful indeed, but if Ginny catches the unfortunate author, our pain will be nothing in comparison to that unknown individual. ^_^

[ginny-t.livejournal.com]

!!! KILLSTABMAIM!!! Raaaaaaar! So bad. *whimper*

[lordshipmayhem.livejournal.com]

I don't think the author was doing this deliberately - it's just their own grasp of the Queen's English that is at fault.

That entire story should be taken out and SHOT.

[toxicskye.livejournal.com]

Okay, ow.
Reading that left me with an odd flinch-like smile.
Gave me some giggles, though.

[lordshipmayhem.livejournal.com]

I had the full story. It left me with stomach pains. ^_^

[yumelady.livejournal.com]

Man those lines were hilarious. I had stomach pains with so few...how on earth did you get through all of it? Much as the Ginny goes "Raar" I was too busy laughing. My IM speelings are terrible too. IM and texting have butchered the English language...